Shocked public opinion, with bated breath, expressed its disgust upon hearing the news that an irreverent - and intemperate, I say - old man defecated behind a statue of Athena Nike, I think - indifferently of course - inside the museum of the Acropolis! Curses, spells, sobs, abominations, I would add exorcisms, if the monument was not pagan in nature and therefore religiously forbidden, were heard! Shame and dishonor and shame and dishonor and more, formal and abominable!
Personally, I cannot understand the magnitude of the rage... when and since we are gripped by a physical need that cannot be postponed, as the national bard aptly states - commonly, I say, the asses tighten, what do you do? The need for charity? Do you tighten up and hold on? Are you running tight and drenched in sweat, an extremely dangerous and futile situation? Because how to avoid the fatal? After all, we are talking about an old man, and it is well known that the old man will fall or from what Veggos said to Papatrekhas... Papatrekhas, clearly, the grandfather could not be, so... he found relief and joy beside the folds of the tunic of Athena Polias, Promachus, Parthenos, telospantos, indifferent..
But for a moment, isn't this the quintessence of the statue's existence? If we etymologize the concept, we will find that it comes from the verb agallomai, that is, I am happy! But this is exactly what the man in our story eagerly sought... a lifeline, a place of relief from the intestinal contractions and the horror of the cut; the grandfather cut, with tight lips, and not only that... he searches freed from his conventionality and hypocrisy of propriety, what could be simpler: the man must get lost somewhere!
Um, so what did you want him to do? To burst? And who would then take responsibility for… the split? The curator of the museum? Mrs. Lina? I think she was in China during those days, apparently to promote and export our cultural product to the market there...
I, my friends, think that somewhere we have lost our sense of humor and our genetic instinct, as a people, in Europe! Because, if we had it, we would easily perceive the ridiculousness of the thing and react more naturally, just like our protagonist, who, running to find the... place, saw, as it were, a divine vision, as if from a machine goddess, Nike, to show him with her outstretched hand the way to Purgatory... and without a laxative... So she cried out a Nenikiamen, just like the glorious ancestor and accomplished his, almost disgusting, task! This feeling, undoubtedly, distinguishes us throughout the ages as a race.. I imagine that anyone who has experienced the agony of cutting, shares the reaction of the grandfather, at least from my side I sympathize!
I am also certain that the most important psychographer and dramatist of the Greek race, Aristophanes, if he had come across a similar incident, would have inspired a comic performance of epic proportions, with which, if staged at the Great Panathenaia, he would probably win the grand prize! And if not, certainly the applause of the spectators. Then I'd see those now squinting and yelling in outrage, what if the intemperate grandpa went viral?
I, anyway, if I had him in front of me, I would ask him about what has been tormenting me since I learned about his adventure: With what paper did you wipe yourself, my grandfather?